So Not Good

The rumors were out there that the CCAA would only give referrals for 2 - 3 days but I refused to believe it. Then my ususal very quiet agency sent an e - mail confirming it. This is absolutely devestating for those October families expecting rerferrals this month and it has made me numb. Right when I think I have a good idea when our referral will come it gets pushed out again. I am not in a good place right now and I am just so sad for all of us in the China Adoption Community. I have to belive that our day will come but it is so hard not knowing when and being disapointed 15 straight months! I feel bad for my boys because they deserve a happy sane mommy but this wait is just draining me. Tomorrow is a new day and maybe I'll be able to put today behind me but I think it's going to be a tough couple of days with a few tears shed!